Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Number of Days Absent: Too Many

I don't presume to have a big readership that is disappointed at my lack of posting over the past months. However, I know how I feel when I show up at a blog I enjoy reading only to find the blogger has disappeared without a trace. Disappointed.

So, to explain. I started this blog with the intention that I would use it as a writing exercise, a way to ensure that come Hell or high water, I would at least write something every day. And in the beginning, this was fairly easy to do. I seemed to have a lot to blab about. Plus, the whole blogosphere was a new playground for me. I'd spend hours above and beyond the time I spent blogging just cruising from blog to blog. Yes, hours.

Now, two years and some months later, I'm finding that I don't have so much to say. Since I'm not a published writer, my commentary on writing seems kind of...well, premature might be the best word for it. Sure, I can share my own experiences. But to be honest, I don't personally enjoy blogs wherein the blogger is just offering me a daily snapshot of where he or she stands in the writing/revisions/editing process. Reading that Writer X finished her 4,500 word quota for the day and is 50% through her editor's revisions for her latest opus kind of depresses me. I'm sure as heck not going to do that here, just for lack of anything better.

Instead, I'm cutting back. I've already cut back on my blog hopping. I just couldn't afford the time suck of it. I wish that I were one of those amazingly disciplined folks, gals who get up at 5 a.m., spend exactly 1/2 hour on e-mail and internet stuff, then buckle down to work, taking a 45 minute break at precisely 12:32 to eat lunch and answer more e-mail, then back to writing. I'm too much of a slacker. My schedule ends up looking something more like, sit down to write but decide to check e-mail first. Then hop on over to televisionwithoutpity.com to see if the recap of my favorite show is up, instead cruise the message boards for an hour, jump over to see if AAR has any new reviews I might be interested in, rinse and repeat until all of the sudden, it's 3:00 and the kiddies are walking in the door from school. Day wasted as far as writing goes. I console myself by saying that I do my best work after it's dark anyway, but dang, wouldn't you know that by 9:00 I'm feeling the urge more to watch a movie than write. And then it's time for a bit of reading before bedtime...

Are you getting the picture?

Anyway, I've cut back on blog hopping and internet cruising, and it's like breaking a bad habit. I find that after I've gone awhile without it, I don't really mind. I don't miss it too much. In fact, I feel kind of liberated.

Except for this blog. Which always kind of nags the guilty corner of my mind. So I'm saying here and now that I'm cutting back. I might not post every other day or every week. I might only show up every other week, when I actually have something of value to say. That makes more sense to me than to try to think up a page of blather just so I can say I posted something daily. I'd rather spend that energy working on my writing.

You know, trying to gain some of that discipline stuff I so clearly lack.

5 comments:

Meljean Brook said...

I'm having the same problem -- not enough stuff to say right now (except, it seems, where I am in the process of everything.) And I feel like my blog is just a piece of crap right now, not very interesting, but not sure I have time and energy to make it different ... at least right now. Sigh.

I think this happens to me a couple of times of year, though -- blogger burnout? Where I just need to get away from it for a while, and focus on the writing, not being distracted by the stuff that surrounds the writing.

meljean brook said...

Question: how many times can one burned out blogger use the phrase "right now" in a paragraph?

:-D

Lynn M said...

LOL! Yeah, in a million years I never would have imagined that I - of all people - would run out of things to say! To a captive audience, no less. But somehow blathering on about the dog waking me up in the middle of the night to be let out or how much I loved/hated the last movie I saw seems kind of pointless if I'm just filling space to fill it.

I'm going to save myself (tee hee!) for when I have something at least profound enough for me think about blogging about it. And I'm going to try not to feel guilty when I go a few days (or weeks) without saying anything at all.

catherine said...

Thank the gods! It's comforting to know others feel as sense of "lack" when reading the "progress reports" in other writer's blogs. :)

Lori said...

I am very new to the whole blogging experience, but I completely get your point. The main reason I never blogged before was because I could not see how much would I have to say on daily or any regular basis, considering that I am not comfortable making it too personal (why let waste the nice little brown leather diary that I just bought?). I know it can get to the point where you just fill up space. Well, it happens. But most times blogging seems to be a very inspiring and creative experience. Terribly addictive too.