Wednesday, March 18, 2009

He's A Magic Man

Holy Cow!

Why do I find this guy amazingly sexy?

He is everything not what I normally imagine when I think of my "perfect guy."

First of all, he's openly gay. Not that I have any issue with homosexuality. But I'm a woman, so the preferring of the males kind of doesn't work for me so much.

Secondly, he's really embraced the whole goth/emo look, complete with black fingernail polish and guy-liner so thick he probably goes through more in one night than I have in my entire life. I've never been big on fingerless black leather gloves or jet-black hair dyed colors not found in nature. I've never been a big fan of any look that requires so darned much effort to affect. Give me a pair of faded Levis, a white tee shirt and a comfy gray hoodie any day of the week for pure honest sexiness. Same with the hair. If I have to fight my guy for the flatiron, something isn't right.

And if all that weren't enough "not my cuppa", the guy looks like he's rocking some ear gauges. I hate - HATE - ear gauges. Granted his aren't the inch-wide, disfiguring horrors they could be, and they are black and thus blend in with his hair. Still...ick.

He's not an alpha male, at least not in the traditional sense. He's a hard core theatre boi, as far from the special operator/firefighter/super spy/he-man manly man as any male could probably be. He's prettier than most women, and not in that masculine male-model way. He's androgyny personified.

So what is it about American Idol contestant Adam Lambert that has me glued to the screen whenever he's performing? I simply cannot look away. I'm mesmerized.

I find him to be walking, talking sex appeal on a stick. He's a gay man who makes straight women want to do very wrong things. He's the antidote to vanilla. He's the thing that entices you into the dark and keeps you coming back for more. He's Spike. He's that boy your mama warned you about but you just can't stay away from.

And I have absolutely no idea why this is. Really.

I do know that I'm not the only one who has reacted to him this way. In last night's critique of his performance, Kara DioGuardi told Adam that he made her feel "confused, but happy." I'm so on board with this. Completely.

Or, as recapper Jacob put it in his latest AI recap on TWoP:

"It is... I hate this, because he makes me talk like Paula because people words don't work for things that are essentially otherworldly, so every week it's difficult to describe without resorting to these weird labored metaphors. So -- beyond saying that the Jeff Buckley vocal resemblance gets stronger every week and somebody needs to mention that already -- like... It's sort of like what if that movie Queen Of The Damned were not only real, but interested in slipping you a roofie and selling you on the black market. He screeches out some kind of artsy orgasm and nearly pulls his shirt up over his head, and then just starts wailing like some forgotten homosexual Greek myth about sailors that never come home. It's... Totally awesome. Of course. I feel weird and crazy, and entertained. Those sudden register shifts used to freak me out with Jeff Buckley too, like, "And now I am a lady... And now I am a dude again." I can't imagine how uncomfortable that must have been for lots and lots of people."

There just aren't the right kind of words out there to describe what goes through my head when Adam performs. It's beyond me.

I can identify one undeniable aspect of his appeal, at least as far as I go. Adam simply oozes confidence. He knows who he is, what he is, what he wants to be, and he makes zero apologies to anyone for any of it. I think confidence is the sexiest trait a man can have, and Adam has it in spades. When he's on it, he owns the stage.

I admit, Adam is an extremely polarizing performer. You pretty much either love him (!) or hate him. You get him or you don't. Unfortunately, from what I've garnered on various message boards and via various Idol reviews, getting him/liking him or not is much dependent on where you stand in general conservativeness or liberalness. Seems like the Obama supporters are on board whereas the McCain/Pallin cheer team simply doesn't get him. I think you have to have a pretty wide open mind in order to appreciate the experience that is Adam Lambert.

You can check out the video of his performance last night here. Check out the rest of his videos if you want to see if you, too, will fall victim to Adam's brand of magic.


Anonymous said...

I've never seen Adam, but this post reminds me of my teeange crush on Boy George. :-) -- willaful

Lynn M said...

Oh wow! I don't know if I should be disturbed by the idea that my fixation on Adam is a lot like one on Boy George or amused by it ;-) I can see the same weirdness of both scenarios. It's good to know that I'm not the only one out there with odd attachments. Maybe we should form a support group!