Best Part of the Super Bowl

I didn't watch the Super Bowl. I'm not a huge fan of professional football, so unless a team I have a particular interest in is in the thing, I'm not so keen to sit in front of the TV for four hours watching men chase each other down a field. One reason I don't like Super Bowl parties is because I have no choice of whether to watch the game or not. The only time I got jazzed about the Super Bowl was the four years the Buffalo Bills gave it a shot, but in my house, we don't go there.

Anyway, I did sit on the couch with my laptop in order to keep my husband company while he watched the final quarter. I figured maybe I'd catch some cool commercials. Mostly we noticed that ABC ran a lot of promos for their own shows, which the hubbie noted seemed a bit stupid considering how much money could be made selling those spots to paying advertisers. Apparently a 30 second spot ran some $2.5 million. That's some serious coin.

I did laugh at the Lost promo, though, parodied to Robert Palmers Addicted to Love. Hubbie thought it too cheesy, but I thought it was funny.

The only other commercial that stands out was a totally ridiculous send up of a Godzilla movie. The gigantic monster tramples through the city only to come face to face with the gigantic robot. You anticipate the smackdown, but no, the oversized creatures fall in love. So far, kinda cute. They hold hands. They frolic by the riverside. But wait, what's that? The lizard monster is pregnant? Okay, just, eww. And she gives birth to - wait for it - an SUV?

So. Totally. Stupid.

I will now not ever, even if the 5,000 other reasons I have miraculously disappear, buy a Hummer because of that stupid-ass commercial. I suppose the spot was successful on the front that I do remember what was being sold. I was an advertising major in college, so I know at least one objective was met.

Worse, though, was the Emerald Nuts commercial. For some reason someone thought it would be a good thing to throw together these totally unrelated characters because the first letter of the character was a letter in the word Emerald. Some kind of funky mnemonic device to help you remember Emerald that was beyond stupid. But, again, I do remember the name, and that's something.

Which leads me to ask, what the heck are these ad creatives smoking when they are sitting around the conference table, brainstorming, and someone throws out the idea that a commercial where a monster cross-breeding results in an SUV is a fabulous idea? Where are the account execs to put a stop to it?

I remember the glory days of Super Bowl commercials. The days of the Coke delivery guy sneaking a Pepsi out of the convenience store refrigerator, only to have them all fall on the ground. Or the Michael Jordan/Larry Bird game of horse to win a Big Mac, when the shots keep getting more and more absurd but hilarious? Or Clydesdales playing football? Classics.

I did see one great one last night via a recap on Comcast's Fan; for Ameriquest. A woman in the window seat of a crowded flight needs to use the bathroom. She's forced to crawl over her two sleeping male seat mates. On her way over, her skirt gets caught on the tray table hook and is hiked up. She stumbles, lands on one man's lap in quite a compromising position just as the cabin lights come up. Across the aisle a mother and her little girl look on, horrified. It's very clever.

When I was in college, I wanted to write those kinds of ads. I have a feeling, though, that more of the Emerald Nut variety are the norm.